A Calling

I feel a calling for me to be in the mission field. I don't know if that means here in Greensboro...NC....US....Argentina. I dont know. All I know is that God has called me to do this. I felt called because at the end of the day all I care about is if I have furthered The kingdom; You cant do that with idle hands. I am going to be a missionary. 

A calling is not when someone tells you that you are good at something, so you should jump on board. A calling is when God tells you in some way that you ARE going to do a certain thing. God may call me to do something that isn't my strength. Thus, people cannot tell me that my calling is, for example, music because I am good at it. My calling is what GOD has in store for me, not what people have in store for me!!

However, I am so blessed to be able to lead worship, and I am glad I have such a position in a church to lead a congregation into worship. 

My point: People should NEVER tell you what you "should" be doing. Let God do it, HE knows best.

-C.

At a crossroads

Hey Everyone!

Im stumped. Confused. Baffled. Discouraged. Saddened.

I dont know what to do with this situation anymore but to pray. I feel there is nothing I can do to help the situation at NH. I find it sad that the people who set up for church are almost always the teenagers. We make up the band almost. But we also get the blame for making stupid decisions, which I am not arguing with, (Were young, we do and say stupid stuff. Not an excuse though). Church, to me,  is about worship. Learning. Being informed. Taking action.

I feel like I have lost that. Im in the process of trying to regain what I once adored about church, and that is community and accountability. I need people to be there for me when I don't know what to do. When I am in college, will I have people to keep me accountable. Will I "get lost" in the world? I don't want that to happen. 

Im frustrated. And when I get frustrated I say things I don't deeply mean or feel about, and do immature things, things that in the end consequence, cost me friends. 

So you say "What ARE you doing Cait?".  

All I can do is pray. I can not put my hope and faith in other PEOPLE. When/If I do, I will always find myself at the place I am RIGHT NOW...

Stumped. Confused. Baffled. Discouraged. Saddened.

Ill leave with this: I hope I can better my attitude, words, actions, and FAITH in God. And if I have hurt anyone in ANYWAY, all I can say is that its MY fault. I AM to blame. God is doing big things inside my heart.

cait.

What's It Gonna Take?

The Facts:

1: Michael Jackson died today. (June 25, 2009)

2: MTV decides to actually play some music on their channel.

Based on the facts: It seems that it takes a stars' death for MTV to reiterate the name of its channel. 

MUSIC TELEVISION. 

Im ashamed.

Trying Too Hard

I find myself some nights trying to write; whether it be a song, a blog, or a letter. Some nights writing these come easier than others. Especially with songs, I never try to write "fake" or "forced" songs, because when I do, they don't have substance and don't mean as much as those that I took a lot of thought into. I feel like when Im trying too hard, things become just another deadline or due date. Somethings shouldn't have deadlines. 

c

Closer and Closer

If you all don't know, I am leaving for Tucuman, Argentina July 20th. I cant wait to see what I learn and what I may teach. Im so anxious to leave. We will be working with the children's ministry, and I will most likely be playing guitar down there, (which I am soooo stoked about).

But I just wanted to take a little time to express my thankfulness towards my friends and family. I am almost fully funded. It is so amazing to not have to really "worry" about the finances. 

One thing Im really looking forward to is spending time with out group, Our team is really small, 3 other women plus myself. Im thinking this is gonna be an incredible journey. Id like to become a missionary after college, and Im hoping that this trip will just give me a glimpse of mission work in the future. 

I still have money I need to raise, and I have a couple more gigs coming up and I will keep yall informed about. For now I can for sure tell you this: Ill be playing at Starbucks on Huffman Mill Rd in Burlington, NC on June 13. Not sure about times, Ill keep ya updated. 

More to come,

Cait